maybe we're from the same star
by cyclothimic
Summary: the four significant New Years that Oliver spent with Felicity, and the one time without.


**olicity deserve a new year fic after everything that has happened. this is in the same universe as _in your eyes, in your mind_ , so there is no William or Samantha. there is Connor and Sandra. **

* * *

_Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together?_

 _Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences._

 _-Emery Allen_

* * *

For the lack of better word, lightning struck Team Arrow when they heard that Barry was struck by lightning. Or, to put it simply, lightning struck Felicity Smoak.

Oliver and Diggle had been sparring on the mat with Felicity sitting in her usual chair. Oliver was definitely aware of Felicity's occasional thirsty glances in his directions and he would be lying if he said it motivate him to spar longer just to sweat more for the benefit of her feasting her eyes on him. But then her phone rang and he almost publicly cursed at whoever it was that snatched her eyes away from him.

"Say that again?" Felicity's scared voice finally got them both to stop and look at her curiosity. But she had her back to them and her phone to her ear and a hand to her other ear. "Oh god, how was it?" Oliver frowned at Diggle to which Diggle could only shrug. "Okay, I'll be on the next train to Central City. What's his room number?" She managed to produce a piece of paper and write a series of letters on it before she murmured a thank you and hung up.

"Everything okay?" Diggle asked before he could.

Felicity spun her chair around, too slowly to his liking. And when he saw her face, he knew it was nothing good. And when she mentioned Central City, well, as far as he was concerned, they only knew Barry Allen.

"Barry got struck by lightning." Oliver's eyebrows rose to the edge of his hairline in utter disbelief. She wasn't serious, was she? "Seriously, he was struck by lightning. The particle accelerator exploded and I don't know how it got to him but it did."

"The particle what?" he asked dumbly.

She gave him a look that always made him feel inferior and reminded him of his lower intelligence compared to hers. "I gotta take a few days off and go to Central City."

He knew it was stupid and unfair to feel jealous towards a guy who was just struck by lightning but he did. And honestly, he really thought Barry was a good guy and maybe he wouldn't be so bad for Felicity. "Yeah, sure, take a few days off," he said, hoping that nobody could sense the hint of reluctance in his voice.

But of course she could sense it. Diggle glanced at him with a knowing look while Felicity took his reluctance for another meaning. "Don't worry. I'll help you guys from over there since I've already set up a private network just for us. It'll be like I never left."

A week later, Oliver began to find out exactly how wrong Felicity was. Her absence was deeply felt. He didn't realize how empty the Foundry could be without a voice constantly filled with optimism and embarrassment filling the voids. He got so used to her chatter and mumbles to herself that he could hardly bear to be in the Foundry for more than an hour.

"What are you doing here?"

He glanced up from sharpening his arrows. He took out his earplugs that were blaring music that his sister had just uploaded onto his iPod. "Arrow duties don't stop just because it's New Year's Eve."

Diggle looked ready to refute but maybe there was something on Oliver's face that stopped him. "Okay." He then jerked his head towards the old trunk. "Think we can toast to a New Year and maybe a safer Starling?"

Oliver nodded. "Sure." He poured them two glasses and then they waited for the countdown to start from upstairs where the club was. As he waited, he wished that Felicity was there to toast with them.

When they started chanting, Diggle chanted along under his breath while Oliver just waited. When the fireworks were audible, they clicked their glasses together.

"Happy New Year, Oliver," Diggle stated.

"Happy New Year, Diggle."

Just then, their phones chimed at the same time.

 _Happy New Year, guys! I'm toasting to criminals being too busy watching the fireworks to actually commit any crime tonight because my two boys totally need a break! – Felicity_

Well, it seemed that Felicity was determined to let them know that it would be like she never left.

* * *

For the past three days, he had been forced to stay on the cot and recuperate from the almost life threatening wound Ra's Al Ghul had given him. Oliver's attempts to argue and go home were painfully protested by his own body where each time he moved, his chest burned.

He didn't even get to actually celebrate Christmas with his family back home.

Every night since the mountain, he'd been having reoccurring dreams, all with the same beginning and most of the time with a happy ending before he was rudely awakened to be reminded that those dreams wouldn't be realized because he just couldn't do that to Felicity. He missed her. He missed her so terribly that he didn't have to move for his chest to ache like salt to his wounds.

On New Year's Eve, he woke up in the middle of the night to the echo of her voice. Somehow, it didn't feel like it was just in his head. It felt real.

" _God, Oliver, where are you_?" It was spoken like a pained whisper, as if she couldn't bear the thought of something fatal happening to him and he desperately wanted to reassure her that he was alive and he would come back because he would _always_ come back to her.

"Did you hear that?" he asked Tatsu and Maseo – he refused to call him Sarab – who were sitting quietly by the fireplace.

Maseo only looked at him while Tatsu asked, "Hear what?"

Oliver stared at his two companions for a long moment before he decided to keep it to himself, shaking his head. "Must be the medicine," he told them.

Before he drifted to sleep, he could hear Tatsu wishing him, "Happy New Year, Oliver Queen."

Yeah, he wished.

* * *

"I'm so officially done with Christmas and New Year," Oliver could hear Thea's voice drifting into the room.

He would laugh if he could, but he couldn't. How could he laugh when his fiancée – the love of his life who he had literally just proposed to – was lying in bed with 'touch and go' as her official status from her surgeon? He could only sit there, clad in clothes he hadn't changed out of in days and beard he hadn't bothered to shave, and hold onto her hand, waiting for the moment when she would squeeze back.

Oliver definitely agreed though. He would join her on this _Christmas and New Year Boycotting Squad_. He could imagine Felicity giving them that name with a roll of her eyes and a huff. Nothing good had happened during this time of the year, not since he came back. In fact, he might just join the _Good Things Happen when It's June_ club.

"You're ridiculous," Laurel responded to his sister.

"Seriously, even before I know of this Team Arrow –"

"Oliver hates that name," Diggle interrupted.

"Oh please, he loves everything Felicity says."

True.

"Anyway, even before I know of this Team Arrow, things had always gone from suck to worse in a matter of seconds around Christmas and New Year. So I hereby declare a boycott."

His attention was quickly snatched away when he felt a squeeze on his hands. His eyes went from blurred to focused, all on her pale pallor and her messy hair – still so beautiful. He stared wide-eyed, waiting. And then…another squeeze. He squeezed back and reached a hand out to smooth back her hair from her forehead.

"Felicity?" he whispered frantically. "Felicity?" Louder. He could indistinctively hear the door open wider and his friends – _family_ – clambering to the bed once they heard his voice. Nonetheless, he gave them no thought and just stared at Felicity. "Can you hear me, Felicity?"

The most miraculous thing happened two seconds later. She frowned and made a sound, the sound she always made when she woke up and threw her hand over his hip and buried her head in his chest. He jumped onto his feet, his chair clattering backwards. He leaned forward with a disbelieving laugh.

"You guys…are so loud," she said in strained voice.

In an instance, the whole room erupted with joy and liberation. Thea and Katie gasped and laughed at the same time. Diggle murmured a prayer of thanks. Donna, well, true to her eccentric self, leaped to the other side of the bed and grabbed Felicity's other hand, tears running down her face and the biggest grin Oliver had seen on the woman lighting up her face.

Oliver almost collapsed forward, resting his forehead against hers and smiling at her. She smiled back at him. He didn't know he could as happy as he was now to see those beautiful azure eyes staring back at him with the same amount of love and adoration he realized he had gotten so used to over the last three years and a half.

"I missed you," he mumbled only for her over the carnage happening behind him.

She moaned. "I dreamt of you." He felt tears springing to his eyes. "I dreamt of kids together. I dreamt a life, Oliver."

He nodded. "We will have that, Felicity. I promise."

"And you never break a promise."

"You know it."

"Hey, guys." They turned back to see Thea looking out the window. "They're counting down now."

"Oh, it's New Year's Eve?" Felicity asked.

Oliver nodded. "Yeah."

And they counted down along with the people in the city until the fireworks erupted and illuminated the room in rainbow color. Oliver naturally leaned down give Felicity a kiss, not too much because she had only just woke up, after all.

"Glad I woke up to a New Year kiss."

"I love you," he whispered.

* * *

"I don't think I can survive until midnight," Felicity moaned into his shoulder.

"They will be very disappointed in you if you don't," Oliver teased, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"I pushed both of them out of my vagina. They don't get to be disappointed in me," she grumbled.

"Oh god, ew," Sara complained from across them. "Too much information."

"It's childbirth, Sara. There's nothing un-gross about childbirth. Deal with it," Lyla voiced from the other side of the room.

"I concur," Diggle said next to her.

They were about to carry on the conversation when a loud shriek from the lawn distracted them, putting most of them on high alert. And then Barry leaped to his feet when he realized it was his wife shouting for him. They filed after him, wondering if this would be the year when the Christmas curse returned.

Only to see a pool of water at Caitlin's feet and a pale Barry and three curious children surrounding the woman.

"Shit, her water just broke," Felicity mumbled, drowsiness all forgotten as she and Lyla rushed towards their friend, clearly seeing that Barry was at a loss.

And then amidst the shouts and yells and the berating of a bumbling speedster, they managed to send Caitlin to the hospital in time for beginning of birth. They waited in the waiting room impatiently, Felicity not being to sleep in the end because she was anxious for her friend. Oliver could only wonder if he should fetch bandage for Barry's hand, but then he remembered that his friend healed fast.

He could still recall Felicity giving birth to their first child, their daughter Dinah, six years ago. He was spiraled into a state of panic and unknown because this was his wife and this was technically his second kid – he already knew about Connor by then – but she was his first child with his wife and dear god the last time he heard Felicity cry like that was in one of his nightmares.

If it wasn't for Laurel taking reins and calling the ambulance and then slapping him to get him back to his senses, he would probably still not know what to do and Felicity might even divorce him.

It was difficult childbirth, taking more a little more than four hours to finally push the baby out. The sticky, bald, tiny and absolutely magnificent of a baby girl who they named after the Black Canary.

"It's a boy," Barry announced to them two hours later, his hand remarkably pale and void of bruises. He had a blissed smile on his face. Oliver totally understood.

"And right before New Year. Your kid has great timing," Felicity commented, approaching him for a hug. "Congratulations, Barry."

That night when they returned to their place – they had moved from the loft back to the mansion once Felicity had managed to repossess it – Felicity put the kids to bed and climbed into bed with Oliver.

"It's two hours past New Year."

"And I still haven't gotten my kiss," she complained, propping her chin on his chest.

He chuckled and leaned forward to kiss her lips, slowly pushing her onto her back and hover over her. "I love you, Felicity."

She pulled him down for another kiss, murmuring, "I love you too." And then throes of passion followed, making them forget about the night before and only know about each other.

* * *

Barry came out into the patio and sat down next to him. Oliver could feel his friend staring at him with concern and impatience. He just stared out into the night air, his wrinkled fingers holding a glass of red wine – he'd been prohibited from hard alcohol when they found that he had heart problems two years ago.

"You okay?" Barry instigated.

Oliver clenched his jaw. "No," he answered sincerely.

Barry sighed, but Oliver could hear the familiarity and the non-surprise in that one breath.

It had been two years since Oliver quite literally took his late wife's breath away with one last kiss that she had asked for; two years since he lost half of his soul that he could never get back until he was 86. Oliver had taken his promise to Felicity to heart and attempted to enjoy life as much as possible with his family. But she was always in the back of his mind and they were used to his occasional relapse into utter dejection of missing her that they often left him alone.

But obviously Barry was having none of it. "Look, normally, we would leave you out here to mope. However, it's New Year's Eve and your family is in there waiting for you to count down with them."

"It's not even eleven-thirty," Oliver lamely protested. "Let me mope."

"No."

Oliver turned his head to glare at his friend but honestly, he lost his ferocity the moment he married Felicity and allowed her to placate him like a tame animal. Only Felicity Smoak could handle him. And now he had no Felicity Smoak.

"We all miss her, Oliver." Barry offered a sad smile. "She was remarkable."

" _Thank you for remarking on it_." His head echoed and he closed his eyes to sweep it away.

"She was the glue of all of us together and we all miss her terribly. But that only means we should continue to live for her, to not disappoint her for however long we have to live. And she would want you to spend New Year's Eve inside with your kids and your family instead of moping alone out here."

Oliver took in a trembling breath. He failed to reel back the tears, allowing one drop to roll down his cheek. "Sometimes, it hurts so much that I can't breathe," he confessed for the first time in two years. "Sometimes, I wonder what the point is if she's not here."

"I know, Oliver. The point is she didn't live 75 years and spent half of it being with you for you to throw yourself away in your late years. She wouldn't want that for you." Barry paused. "I _promised_ her that I would keep you alive. And she'd kill me again after I die if I don't. So please, don't make me break my promise to her. And don't break your promise to her." Barry stood up and patted his shoulder. "Let's go inside."

It took Oliver a full long minute before he stood up and followed Barry inside, greeted by his family and friends with cheerfulness and more wine. He spent the next 45 minutes chatting with his old friends, laughing at the young ones' antics, playing with his grandchildren and fulfilling his promise.

Maybe it was just an illusion but he could swear that he felt Felicity next to him the whole time, telling him that she was proud of him and that she was still waiting for him.

* * *

 **Felicity Smoak is not dead. (i wish she does not turn into Oracle because that name belongs solely to Barbara Gordon, sorry)**


End file.
